July 1st, 2010

I just finished my last dose this month of Prometrium last night and decided to take a pregnancy test this morning. BFN.

Ovulation Celebration #3

I have to say this is pretty cool, my LH surge happened on the day before Father's day. So I had a good chance of ovulating on father's day or the day after, which happens to be my husband's birthday. That would be pretty sweet. This is our 3rd LH surge with clomid. I go back to the Dr. in July, hopefully he will tell me I'm pregnant, but with the many test I take I'm sure I will know before he does. Fingers crossed and prayers said.....we will see.

When I get to tell Liz

I have figured a way to tell Liz when I get pregnant. It's probably too soon to be thinking about stuff like this but it keeps my mind off the fact that I'm not pregnant yet, sooo.

For Liz's 11th B-day I had a lady crochet me 3 big dolls to look like Liz, Derrick and myself. I went and bought clothes for them and dressed them how we would dress. When she opened them she fell in love with them. They set on bed all the time. And she loves to show them to her friends when they come over. So I thought what a great way to tell her that there is going to be another child than to give her a gift of the newest addition to the family. I had my friend crochet me a baby for Liz to unwrap. It is the cutest thing I've ever seen. She even made the cutest blanket to wrap it up in. so cute!!!!. I've have it hid until the time is right. I can't wait to see the look on her face.

Results on Cycle 5 with meds

BFN - Big Fat Negative. I cried today. The doctors only give you 6 rounds with Clomid. I just used up #2. So, I'm not sure how I feel. I want a baby, not just for me, but for our family. Derrick usually reads the results of the test. I know he hates telling me no. Now Liz has my cycles down and you can just see it in her face when I tell her " Not this month" I think that breaks my heart more than anything. Liz and me were talking about all this baby stuff and she asked me, "Why did God make us keep waiting?" It took everything in me not to cry. I gave her the answer I try so hard to believe myself. "That God wants us to have a baby, but when we wait for things it makes us love them more." "That there is some reason that don't make since right now, that we can't see right now, but in time it will be revealed. And one day she will hold her little brother or sister in her arms and will tell them the story how God answers prayers." " I reminded her how we waited for 5 years for Derrick to come into our life, and 9 years for him to be her official Daddy and how we love him so much more cause we waited and we know he was an answered prayer." So I will allow myself to be sad just one moment. Then I will only allow myself to think that one day I will hold my second child in my arms and tell them how God answered my prayers.

Putting together the pieces

If you click on this one to get a better view. You can see that this one is all about PCOS. I don't have all the symptoms listed but I do have quite a few. Each one you see can be devastating to a woman. Knowing there is no cure makes you feel like it is all on you to do what you can to stop each symptom. As is having PCOS is not enough dealing with the side effects of the different medications can be overwhelming for anyone.

Ovulation Celebration #2

Well I got my second positive LH surge test yesterday. I'm so happy. It is nice to have a chance to get pregnant. So we will hope for the best and start that dreaded 2 week wait. It's amazing how much power comes in such a little line.

A Break from PCOS Part 2 Where my hope is!

I'm talking about all the super cute stuff I have found for FB (Future Baby not Face Book!)

I found an adorable crib with mattress for $40.00 at rummage sale, lady's name was Teressa she had twins, one boy and one girl, how cool is that.

I found a changing table that matched the crib at a consignment shop for $20.00, Kid's Closet. Love Jennifer who runs it. Always has a super selection, great prices, and great quality clothes.

I found 2 mattress covers for $1.50 for both at a church rummage sale. Excellent condition.

Bassinet for $30.00 me and my mom split the cost so I was only out $15.00 Cute in good condition there was one spot on the side that looked like it was tore, but no big deal. It's green and yellow has the basket underneath for storage, love that.

I had a dresser given to me by the guy I work with, just so happens it matches the bed and changing table...Thanks Chad.

I'll do a part 3 on all the baby clothes.

I know it's hard but I try to buy used on most stuff, baby's get a new wardrobe every 3 months, it just seems wasteful to buy everything brand new. Plus I love recycled stuff. I think it is great for the earth and for my wallet.

I also plan to cloth diaper and breastfeed but I will talk about that later on.

A Break from PCOS

Today I'm gonna talk about all the really cute stuff I have bought for our future baby. (No I'm still not pregnant yet, but I know in time God will bless me with a child...He just giving me time to prepare everthing for our baby) My nepew and his girlfriend are expecting so I'm also picking up good deals for them.

The latest thing I bought I found at a Restore. It is a store that sells house supplies and the money goes to Habitat for Humanity. I LOVE this store.

I found the cutest baby bedding set for $5.00 no joke. It is a Martha Stewart Baby set, and looks like it has never been used. The pictures really do not do it justice. It is a very pale blue with yellow and green and I would think it could be used for a girl or a boy. I got the comforter, bed shirt and bumper pad all for that price. One of my best baby buys.

On day 2 of Clomid. I feel like I'm actually doing pretty well. I haven't had all the side effects that everyone talks about. I've had a little trouble sleeping but I usually make up for that when I am on the Prometrium. So far I have bought the crib, changing table, bassinet, I already had a rocking chair and book shelf, and I had a dresser given to me. The future nursery is just waiting for God's blessings to fill it. I pray and take my meds. All the rest is in his timing.

I know God is teaching...I have always believed that God has the power to give us a child...but I recently started to believe that He actually will.

YEA!! For once...

Okay so just a quick update... my body is finally back on track and I am due to start clomid actually tomorrow.

#*#**#*#*#Baby Dust to all us TTC's#*#*#*#*#*#

MY BODY WILL OBEY- LOL

Not a chance... I took 2 pregnancy test and they both said negative... With Prometrium I'm suppose to start a new sycle 1 to 2 days after my last pill (I take it for 5 days). Well my last pill was Friday. I took the first test Friday morning. Like I said it was negative. I took another test Sunday morning it was a First Response (5 day sooner test) it was negative. So I did some very light spotting on Sunday and a little on Monday. Sorry I know TMI. So I called the Dr. today to see what I need to do cause I am suppose to start Colmid on Thursday. Dr. said if things don't become norminal by then, then I should take another test that morning. Yeah so I would like just once for my body to do what it is suppose to do.

Anyone else have PCOS then I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.

Results on Cycle 4 with meds

Well I was really hoping for this month. I took a test on Sat May 8th,2010 and got a BFN -- Big Fat Negative -- It would have been cool because of Mother's Day and Liz's B-day is next Friday. I really would have loved that. So on to give Cycle 21/cycle 5 with meds. To all mothers out there... Happy Mother's Day. To all the TTC's don't lose hope. ******Baby Dust to All ******

Middle of the 2 week wait. Cycle 4 with meds

This is my first round with Clomid. I took clomid days 5-9 of this cycle. I am shocked to report that I didn't go crazy on the meds like I was expected. We now have a safe word "Banana" in the house. So if I say "Banana" that is code for everybody run. I didn't have to use it but once and we were all trapped in the van together driving. But I managed. On the 29th I finally got a positive LH test (which means things are a go for me to ovulate) we had an OVULATION CELEBRATION. You gotta take things from my point of view. I peed on hundreds of these test ALL negative. So I will celebrate my small victory. About 2 days later I was double over in pain "my ovaries" and could barely walk. So my luck will be instead of A baby I will have a litter of babies. Strike that...I'm not trying to speak that kind of evil on myself. But I was happy to have my day of pain. It was the first time in a while I did not feel broken. The things we take for granted. So now we are in the dreaded 2 week wait. I'm so happy. I waited for a 2 week wait for so long. So I will know by Mother's Day, May 9th, 2010, if I am pregnant. Lord help me not to get my hopes up.

Scripture:
Listen, my son, to your father's instruction and do not forsake your mother's teaching.
Proverbs 1:8

Our Action speak louder than our words. This is especially true in the home. Children learn values, morals, and priorities by observing how their parents act and react every day. If parents exhibit a deep reverence for and dependence on God, the children will catch these attitudes. Let them see you reverence for God. Teach them right living by giving worship an important place in you family life and by reading the Bible together.

April Dr.'s Apt.

Well I was hoping my body would cooperate with me just one time but nope!

I started a new cycle in the middle of my prometrium (the medicine that is suppose to keep me from starting a new cycle) LOL Yeah!

So anyway Cycle 3 with meds was a wash. Onward and upward to cycle 4 with meds. Dr B also prescribed for me Clomid "the evil medicine" I'm told. He asked me if I had heard about any of the side effects. I said, "I've heard it turns you into a raging witch!" and he said, " and that would be putting it mildly." So I just want to go on record saying I love you my wonderful Husband.

Scripture:
"The LORD, the LORD, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation."

Why would sins affect grandchildren and great-grandchildren? This is no arbitrary punishment. Children still suffer for the sins of their parents. Consider child abuse or alcholism, for example. While these sins are obvious, sins like selfishness and greed can be passed along as well. The dire consequences of sin are not limited to the individual family member. Be careful not to treat sin casually, but repent and turn from it. The sin may cause you little pain now, but it could sting in a most tender area of your life later - your children and grandchildren.

Round 3...DING

History: March 12th. starting cycle 19, cycle 3 with meds.

I go to Dr. B on April 5th. we will just have to see how things go until then. Wish us luck

I would like to start adding a verse of scripture at the end of each blog.
" Honor you father and mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord you God is giving you. Exodus 20:12

This is the first commandment with a promise attached. To live in peace for generations in the promised land, the Israelites would need to respect authority and build strong families. But what does it mean to "honor" parent? Partly, it means speaking well of then and politely to them. It also means acting in a way that shows them courtesy and respect (but not to obey then if this means disobedience to God). It means following their teaching and example of putting God first. Parents have a special place in God's sight. Even those who find it difficult to get along with their parents are still commanded to honor them.

Wow this is a two sided story for me...to show what God expects from me as a daughter and as a Mother.

History: Cycle 18, cycle 2 with meds


I was hoping this would be a good cycle because it was my Birthday this month. My husband took me to a Toby Mac and Skillet concert to celebrate. I loved it. I was thinking what if my little zygote, baby ball of cells, was rocking out to some Jesus Freak while forming. Will that mean he would grow up to be a preacher?!? Later that night after the consert we went to Denny's to grab some breakfast and low and be hold AF shows up. Blahhhh! No luck this cycle either.

Children are a testament to love....

The Truth about PCOS

PCOS
Description:
What is PCOS?

* Is also known as Stein-Leventhal Syndrome or Polycystic Ovary Disease (PCOD).

* Affects an estimated 6-10% of all women and most don't even know they have it.

* Is treatable, but not curable, by medications, changes in diet and exercise.

* Is one of the leading causes of infertility in women.

* Has been identified for 75 years and they still aren't sure what causes it.

* Affects far more than just reproduction.

* IT IS NOT just a cosmetic problem.

Symptoms

* Irregular or absent menses

* Numerous cysts on the ovaries in many, but not all, cases

* High blood pressure

* Acne

* Elevated insulin levels, Insulin Resistance, or Diabetes

* Infertility

* Excess hair on the face and body

* Thinning of the scalp hair (alopecia)

* Weight Problems or obesity that is centered around your mid section

*Discoloration of the skin in areas where skin can crease

*Sudden increase in weight gain

*Sudden increase in cravings for carbohydrates

*Depression and mood swings

Causes of Symptoms

*If you have problems with auto-immune disorders, PCOS is directly related to it. For instance, asthma, bumps on your arms or forms of eczema, irritable bowel syndrome, goodpastures syndrome, type 1 diabetes, celiacs disease, etc. Basically autoimmune is the action of your body having an inappropriate immune response against its own tissues.

*PCOS also affects the level of progesterone in your system, and progesterone is a natural anti-depressant. So if you have mood swings, get depressed, etc, this is the reason why. It can be treated through birth control pills that have progesterone specifically in them (for instance YAZ, Yasmin, Ocella, and many others). It can also be treated through creams. I have yet to find another source of it via oral use other than the birth control.

*A lot of the things you're experiencing are the fact that we just have more testosterone in our system than most women, so we take on mens more attractive features as a result. For instance, the hair loss and the excess hair in places me dont want it. I feel I am completely blessed that I do not have this symptom.

The sad part of PCOS is it goes so undetected and women don't realize there are ways to help the symptoms.

It is also passed through generations.

No luck with meds first month.

This is our 17th cycle. But our 1st cycle with meds

So when you take Prometruim you should start your next cycle 1 to 2 days after you have taken your last pill....And I did... Which means no pregnancy. We will try and try again.....because we all know Practice make Pregnant!

Test Results

History: Feb 4th, 2010.

I was picking Derrick, my husband, up from work and he told me that Dr. J. had just called. So I called her back and she said I had all the signs of having PCOS (poly cystic ovarian syndrome). So basically what that means is my blood sugar is fine but my body produces too much insulin. Insulin is what puts the sugar where it needs to go in the body. This pretty much throws you whole body off. Too much insulin causes you to have cyst on your ovaries and stops you from ovulating. This in turn throws your cycles off. The real reason I haven't got pregnant. She put me on Metformin. Which is used to lower your insulin levels. Hopefully this will help.

Metformin: The side effects of this very. It is insane on your digestive system and will make you think, is wanting a child worth going through this. The first weeks of this was crazy, I hurt and cried and hurt and cried. I have found that the less carbs I eat the better I react to the medication.

First Dr. Apt with Dr. J

History: Feb 1st, 2010
Went to Dr. J. I showed her the charting I had done and told her about all the negative ovulation test I had done for the last 3 months. The first month I took the test once a day, The next 2 months I took them twice a day 6 am and 6 pm. Every single test was negative. I just didn't understand why I wasn't ovulating. I also talked with Dr. J about how we had been trying for almost a year. My cycles had been messed up so, which is what I thought was causing me not to ovulate, so she started me on Prometrium for 12 days. This helps me not to start to early and keeps my cycles on track. She also decided to send me to have fasting blood work done the next morning. She said I would get the test results in about a week.

If you are looking for ovulation test you can get them on ebay they are called WONDFO. You can get 100 tests. You can choose how many pregnancy and how many ovulation test you want. Make sure to put it in the notes on your order. They run $19.99 for 100 test. Great Deal.

WOW where do I start....I have a daughter who is 11 and will be 12 in 2 weeks. I married my best friend September 22, 2007. We have been trying to conceive our 2nd child for about just over a year. This is my story.